Final Cut: Nip/Tuck’s Ten Most Shocking Storylines

The recent announcement that F/X’s Nip/Tuck would permanently cease production after filming wrapped in June disappointed the legion of fans hooked on the over-the-top storylines, graphic surgery scenes and twisted characters the pioneering show has offered up since 2003. The completed episodes set to air over the next two years are bound to have their share of twists and turns, but we thought it appropriate to take a fond look back at the most memorable “Oh, my God” moments of the past six years. Believe us when we tell you it wasn’t easy limiting it to just ten.  

 

Christian thawed Dr. Wolper's chilly facade.

The Psycho Therapist

When Christian (Julian McMahon) was tormented by homoerotic dreams about Sean (Dylan Walsh) he turned to therapist Dr. Faith Wolper (Brooke Shields), who promptly informed the shocked doc that he was suppressing a desire for his best friend. Cool and sophisticated in her chic ensembles, Dr. Wolper pressed Christian’s buttons with her haughty manner, when she wasn’t bent over her desk with her skirt pushed down around her ankles, that is. Leave it to Christian to be the one to finally come between Brooke and her Calvins.  

 

Gina (Jessalyn Gilsig) went out with a bang.

Gina Falls for Christian

Potty-mouthed nymphomaniac Gina Russo could never get Christian out of her system. She would pop in and out of his life over the years, but he finally found a way to drop her permanently, albeit unintentionally, when she lured him into an illicit round of rooftop sex so vigorous that poor Christian literally banged her off the side of the building to the street below. He always did consider himself a lady killer.  

Ava Moore (Famke Janssen) was suspicously tall, dark and handsome.

The Lady is a Dude! 

Pushy life coach Ava Moore (Famke Janssen) arrived on the scene to help Julia put her life in order. Her unorthodox methods included seducing Julia’s vulnerable son Matt and slowly turning him against his parents. After a bit of “probing” between the sheets, a crafty Christian discovered that the manipulative Ava was in fact the recipient of the world’s most successful sex change operation. Ava promptly skipped town in a stylish ensemble that RuPaul would have indeed envied.  

Organ dealer James Lebeau coveted Michelle's heart, figuratively speaking.

The Organ Player 

Poor, lonely Liz couldn’t believe her luck when a gorgeous girl picked her up in a bar. Her disbelief proved prophetic when she woke up the next day in a tub full of ice with one of her kidneys missing. An organ harvesting ring using pretty women as bait had hit town, led by James Lebeau, a mysterious woman paying down big-time debt played by the still sexy ‘70s film siren Jacqueline Bisset. James wreaked all sorts of havoc, swiping organs and blackmailing people left and right, all the while nursing a Sapphic crush on one of her former stable girls, Christian’s latest bedmate (and boss) Michelle Landau (Sanaa Lathan). 

 

Phony talent agent Colleen had a fatal attraction for Sean.

The Right Stuff 

When Sean started consulting on a plastic surgery series loosely based on the shenanigans at McNamara/Troy, his overly maternal agent Colleen Rose (Sharon Gless), who in reality sold teddy bears for a living, got rid of some competition from a rival talent agent by stuffing him to death, turning him into a human teddy bear. When Sean wised up to her deception and banished her from his life she pulled a Glenn Close in “Fatal Attraction,” taking several stabs at killing him until meeting her own grisly demise. 

Dr. Logan Taper (Richard Burgi) turned Christian's couch into a love seat.

In the Hot Seat

“Desperate Housewives” actor Richard Burgi made a brief pit stop at McNamara/Troy as Logan Taper, a seemingly perfect surgeon who showed an unusually earnest appreciation for Christian’s office decor. It turned out that the good doctor had a romantic fetish for inanimate objects, which Christian and Sean discovered upon walking in on him as he was molesting Christian’s couch, giving new meaning to the term love seat.   

Dawn Budge (Rosie O'Donnell) was left speechless, for a while, anyway.

Rosie Zips It

As if paying Christian $400,000 to sleep with her weren’t enough, loudmouth lottery winner Dawn Budge (Rosie O’Donnell) returned to McNamara/Troy in need of some work after an unfortunate run-in with an angry bird. In a scenario that would’ve pleased O’Donnell foil Donald Trump to no end, the pugnacious Rosie found herself confined to a bed with her mouth sewn shut. The sight had us in stitches.  

Quentin and Kit were Nip/Tuck's slasher siblings.

Twisted Sister

After months of gruesome attacks on McNamara/Troy’s patients, friends and ultimately Christian and Sean themselves, the serial rapist-slasher known as The Carver was revealed to be the surgeons’ new partner, bisexual eunuch Dr.Quentin Costa. Even more shockingly, sexy detective Kit McGraw (Rhona Mitra), who was sleeping with Christian while investigating the slashings, turned out to be Quentin’s sister and accomplice in his vendetta against McNamara/Troy. Crazy Kit even let Quentin slash her face to throw everyone off the trail. When last seen, the sicko siblings fled town to terrorize the vain throughout Europe.   

Donna Mills guest-starred as a socialite with a purr-fect new face.

The Cat-astrophe

When 1980s soap stars Donna Mills, Joan Van Ark, Shari Belafonte and Deborah Shelton showed up as plastic surgery-addicted socialites, Christian found his dance card quite full with the libidinous ladies.  After administering certain procedures to each — then operating on them — he wound up literally bringing out a kittenish quality in Mills’ character, who was revealed to be off psychiatric medications when she requested a torn-from-the-headlines feline makeover that her livid friends demanded Christian promptly reverse.  

 

Will Julia go back to men now that Olivia is gone?

It’s a Girl Thing

 

After years of shuttling between ex-husband Sean and ex-lover Christian, Julia (Joely Richardson) discovered that the perfect man for her was… a woman. She found love with attorney Olivia Lord (Portia De Rossi), barely surviving multiple attempts on her life by Olivia’s psycho-nymph daughter Eden, only to lose Olivia on the operating table during routine surgery performed by Sean. An understandably upset Eden threw Olivia’s still-warm ashes in Sean and Julia’s faces as a parting gesture.//
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